Wednesday, October 15, 2008

dear excellent friend

This was circulated on a list-serve I belong to and it's just goddamn funny. It's a take on all those ridiculous spam emails that ask for money, and when I read it, I laughed out loud...a lot. Enjoy:


Dear Excellent Friend:

I need to ask you to support an urgent secret business relationship with a transfer of funds of great magnitude.

I am Ministry of the Treasury of the Republic of America. My country has had crisis that has caused the need for large transfer of funds of 700 billion USD. If you would assist me in this transfer, it would be most profitable to you.

I am working with Mr. Phil Gramm, lobbyist for UBS, who (God willing) will be my replacement as Ministry of the Treasury in January. As a former U.S. congressional leader and the architect of the PALIN / McCain Financial Doctrine, you may know him as the leader of the American banking deregulation movement in the 1990s. As such, you can be assured that this transaction is 100% safe.

This is a matter of great urgency. We need a blank check. We need the funds as quickly as possible. We cannot directly transfer these funds in the names of our close friends because we are constantly under surveillance. My family lawyer advised me that I should look for a reliable and trustworthy person who will act as a next of kin so the funds can be transferred.

Please reply with all of your bank account, IRA and college fund account numbers and those of your children and grandchildren to so that we may transfer your commission for this transaction. After I receive that information, I will respond with detailed information about safeguards that will be used to protect the funds.

Yours Faithfully,
Henry Paulson
Minister of Treasury
Department of the Treasury
1500 Pennsylvania Avenue, NW
Washington, D.C. 20220

ps: ignore anything you read at


Dawn on MDI said...

Hey!!! That looks awfully familiar! Glad to see you have time to check your e-mail here and there. Thanks for the visit and nice comment, too. Phone banking went well. Last call of the night was from a woman who was afraid I was the Republicans calling back to yell at her because she had just recently been quite rude to their caller. We chatted for 15 minutes. Made my whole night.

mmoonen said...

homie, check your work email.